Alphabet: Part Two

My continuing efforts to sabotage Celeste learning the alphabet...

Alphabet

Today, I've been helping Celeste practice her alphabet.

Outbreak: Patient Two

So it turns out that I was fine all along and didn't get sick at all.

Report filed: 14/12/2016 1427 GMT

Patient name: 'M'

Point of infection: House, cuddles with infected

Initial symptoms: Grumpy, sarcastic, tired

Later symptoms: Grumpy, sarcastic, tired, upset stomach

Remedial measure: Dosed with 300ml ultrasweet Earl Grey and self-pity. Awaiting results.

Recommended measures: With only 25% of the household left uninfected, recommend taking off and nuking the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.

Chapman household, Wednesday afternoon. Ha! Who's the hypochondriac now?

Outbreak: Patient One

Report filed: 12/12/2016 2101 GMT

Patient name: 'A'

Point of infection: Household - cuddles with Patient Zero

Initial symptoms: Smiling, wiggling, slight diarrhoea

Later symptoms: Giggling, smiling, wiggling, copious neon diarrhoea

Remedial measure: Dosed with milk and cuddles

Recommended measures: Continue quarantining household, shoot-on-sight policy authorised for escapees, await further developments

Special note: With fifty per cent of the household infected and the washing machine running at capacity, morale is low amongst the uninfected adults. Recommend airdrop of wine and chocolate.

No...I'm not being ridiculous, though a survey of adults in my house revealed that 50% of them thought I was a hypochondriac.

Outbreak: Patient Zero

Report filed: 11/12/2016 2015 GMT

Patient name: 'C'
Point of infection: Nursery

Initial symptoms: Lethargy, loss of appetite, shambling toddle around the house

Later symptoms: Vomiting, diarrhoea, incessant singing of the 'Do-Re-Mi' sound from the Sound of Music

Remedial measure: Dosed with Fruit Shoots and chocolate buttons, awaiting results of treatment

Recommended measures: Quarantine the household, reassure all civilians about their exposure and imminent symptoms, await further developments

May God have mercy on our souls...

Baby Writing Challenge SUPER//OVERTIME//MODE Story Seventeen: "Wherever We Go"

So...having a baby uses up a lot of your free time. Having two uses up nearly all of it. Would I swap them both for extra writing time? Well...it remains to be seen whether either of them is a match with me for possible future organ donation.

I kid, obviously. Lyn...if you read this...I am definitely kidding. Unless I need something in the future, in which case this is all forward planning.

I'm entering the final run of stories now. After this, there're only two more to go and 'it's all over save the crying' (read: editing). The master plan is to edit all the stories thoroughly once they're all finished and stick them up as a free book on Smashwords or Kindle. Given the work rate I can currently sustain, that might be after my children leave home.

This story's word was suggested by an old university friend of mine - "swazmacking". Don't look it up in the dictionary - it's entirely fictional! The random genre picker gave me "science fiction robinsonade" - so riffing off Robinson Crusoe. A fictional word and a genre thoroughly mined out in '60s and '70s sci-fi.

*ulp!*

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you "Wherever We Go".

Dictionary Corner

TROJAN WEE (Noun)